Friday Barnes and Case of the Wet Boy

Friday Barnes is called in to help when her hapless repeat client Parker is found asleep on the polo field after a night of heavy rain. It appears that he has been the victim of a prank, but Friday soon realises there is more to his dilemma than meets the eye.

I’m very excited to announce that we now have merchandise for BEDTIME STORIES WITH R.A. SPRATT! You can order t-shirts, sweaters, hoodies, notebooks and coffee cups all with the show’s new logo on it. They look super cool. Here's the link to the online shop...

https://raspratt.threadless.com/designs/bedtime-stories-with-r-a-spratt-2/kids

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:36

Hello, and welcome to bedtime stories with me, RA Spratt. Well, we've got a Friday bond story today, but before we get into that, I've got to go over a couple of things. So this episode is going to go to air on the 30th of June, 2021, which is just a couple of days before my new book comes out. Shockingly good stories, which is based on this podcast. So please buy the book or pre-order of, it's still a couple of days before. Um, that would be fantastic for me. If you did that, um, to support the release of the book, I'm going to be having a book launch at glee books in Sydney on the 8th of July at 10:00 AM. So come along to that. If you're in Sydney, it's going to be fun. I'll be a live recording. An episode of the podcast. You can ask me questions, I'll be signing books. I'll probably think up some sort of crazy stunt to do because Rachel, the lady who works there is also called Rachel has asked me to do something gymnastic in the store. So I'm not quite sure what that's going to be, but I might injure myself, which would be very entertaining. So if you want to come, please do RSVP to Rachel R a C H E L at Glebe books, G L E B O O K s.com.edu, rachel@gleebooks.com.edu, um, other things coming up because I know whenever I announce a public event, everyone who doesn't live in that area, it gets cross with me. So the other public events I've got coming up are on the 24th of July. I'll be appearing at the Kiama Raiders festival, um, or the 31st of July, I'll be at the Shoal Haven readers and writers festival. And in August, I'm going to be down in Melbourne for book week, but I've got public events at the Melbourne writer's festival on the weekend of the sixth and 7th of September. So all those things are coming up. And then in December, I'm going to be doing like a theatrical performance of shockingly good Christmas stories at the monkey bar theater company. So you can get details of all those things and how to buy tickets by going to my website, RA sprat.com. And if you look on the right-hand side, there's an upcoming events box and it's got these things listed. And for some of them it's got links. You can click on to get tickets. Okay? So that's all that stuff out of the way. So now we can get on with a real business of why we're here, which is having a story. So, as I said, it's going to be a Friday

Speaker 2: 2:48

Bond story. And I'm going to read one from Friday bonds, no rules, which is the fourth

Speaker 1: 2:54

Book in the Friday bond series. And my publisher very kindly gave me permission to read this before she went away on maternity leave. And she since had the baby. So hello, Holly of you're listening. And I'm going to read chapter 10, which is the case of the wet boy. Several days later, Friday and Melanie were emerging from their history lesson where they'd been studying the history of the bikini. That was what the class had. Democratically decided they were most interested in when Nigel a third form, boy came running towards them. Bonds, bonds, panted, Nigel, please. You've got to come with me. He needs your help. Again, who asked Friday? Although she suspected that she knew the answer. Nigel had a particularly dimwitted roommate who Friday had assisted before. It's Parker said, Nigel, he's in trouble. What's he done this time? Last Friday, he fell asleep on the polo pitch. Last night said Nigel really said Friday, I find polo boring, but I don't find it that boring. It sounds like a type of thing I would do said Melanie, that's just, it's a nodule. It doesn't make any sense. Didn't it rain last night. So Friday, there was definitely rumbling of thunder in the distance. It must've rained hard said Nigel because Parker was soaked to the skin. When they found him who found him, asked Friday, the polo team said, Nigel, they have a 6:00 AM practice session. That sounds very early, said Friday. They have to practice harder because Ian's been expelled said Melanie, he was the best player on the team. So where is Parker now as Friday ignoring Melanie's reference to Ian he's in sick bay. Being treated for hypothermia said, Nigel. I would've thought he'd be happy about that said Friday. He likes lying around doing nothing. Yes, but he's got an assignment due today, said Nigel, not with Mr. Spencer asked Friday. It is Mr. Spencer said Nigel, and you know how much he hates Parker? Friday nodded the answer was a lot, but I thought all marks were determined by vice principal. Pete self-assessment scheme. Now set Friday, Mr. Spencer did give Parker a chance to do a self-assessment said Nigel. What happened to us Friday? He failed himself, said Nigel. Why asked Friday? Honesty said Nigel Parker said he knew better than anyone that he had no idea about chemistry. So not only is Parker. Seriously ill said Friday. There's a good chance. He'll have to repeat chemistry. That would make him seriously ill. Just to consider I've said, Melanie, please bonds. He got to help him said Nigel. I think Parker has been the victim of some sort of mischief. There must be a reason. He was out on the pitch in the pouring rain. I know he's stupid, but he's not that stupid. It does sound like a prank gone wrong said Friday, if you do help said Nigel, I'm sure Parker will pay you. In fact I'll pay you. I'll let you steal anything you like that belongs to him from our room. Has he got anything I'd want asked Friday? He's got a lot of Batman comics said Nigel not interested said Friday, a genuine limited edition, double ended. Lightsaber said Nigel, just because I love Sam. It doesn't mean I'm a huge nerd set Friday. At least not that kind of nerd. And Melanie, his aunt sent him a$50 note said Nigel, was it his birthday as Melanie? No, it was a growing over 171 centimeters tall. So Nigel he's the first male in his family to be above average height for three generations. But the average height for a male is 175 centimeters set Friday. His aunt's 86. So she's still going off. 1930 statistics said Nigel$50. We'll do said Friday, we'll check it out. Sick bay was just along the corridor from the headmaster's office. So none of the secretarial staff, but it doesn't. I as Friday walked in with Nigel and Melanie, she was so frequently summoned to the headmaster's office. Usually to be yelled at that. They didn't think to question her reason for being there as the three of them walked down the corridor. They could hear yelling, but this time it wasn't the headmaster. It's just not good enough. Isn't that? Mr. Pilcher, his voice said Melanie, Mr. Pilcher was the school groundskeeper. He was a retired army man and always wore the same tan colored workloads. He prided himself on attending to the school's gardens with military efficiency. Yes, that's right. I, I would've thought that someone who works with plants all day, couldn't get that angry. He said, Melanie, the students at this score to Christ yelled, Mr. Pilcher. It's just a few sweet peas said the headmaster soothingly. Oh, fear, sweet peas. Sweet peas. Mr. Pilcher. He'll end up in sick bay himself in a minute, said Friday from having had an anger and juice stroke. No. Who did it said Mr. Pilcher. It's those boys in the medieval reenactment club. They're always pulling up my cane pretending they're swords, but goodness knows why they had to go and burn down the dead Elm tree on the edge of the swamp. Well, it was dead set. The headmaster it'll save you having to chop it down. That's not the point. Yelled Mr. Pilcher. They shouldn't have been interfering with my plants, whether they're alive or I'll look into it said the headmaster. Would you like a chocolate biscuit? This apparently mollified Mr. Pilcher, because there was no more yelling. Nigel knocked on the door to the sick bay and let himself in. I brought someone to see, you said Nigel. Hello? Said Friday. Oh, hello Barnes. Hello? Pelly said, Parker, are you sick too? Parker was lying in bed. He looked pale and tired. But apart from that much, the same as usual, no Nigel was worried about, you said Friday, he's paying me$50 of your money to figure out what happened to you. Oh, apparently I fell asleep in the rain, said Parker shifting the pillow so he could sit up a bit more. Yes, but that is odd. Behavior said Friday. Is there any reason you might've chosen to do it? Perhaps you couldn't get to sleep and you thought a cold shower of rain might help or perhaps you were stargazing fell asleep and got caught in the rain. Sorry. I just don't notice it. Parka shaking his head. Haven't got the foggiest. I can't remember anything after dinner last night. Do you have a history of sleep walking us, Melanie. That's my favorite way to get exercise. I don't think so said Parker. He concentrated hard, but if I was asleep when I was doing, I wouldn't be the one to ask would I you'd have to ask Nigel. No, he doesn't sleep. Walk. Not that I've noticed that Nigel, but I'm a sound sleeper said Friday. Do you remember what you were talking about over dinner? Oh yes. At PACA suddenly remembering the Curry pie. It was disgusting. I liked it said Melanie. I thought it was very tasty. Tasty said Parker with a grimace. This is Marygold has developed an unnatural obsession with coriander. It's like having toothpaste mixed in with your dinner. Curry. Andrew's a very commonly used herb in Southeast Asia. And sub-continent cooking said Friday, poor devil said parka. You think United nations would step in and intervene. Show them how to cook a good sausage or something. Aside from the pie. Did you have anything on your mind as Friday? Anything troubling you? Not at all said Parker. I'm not one for dwelling on things you were worried about your history lesson. Nigel reminded him. Oh, yes. Said parka frown in his, he remembered we've been studying Benjamin Franklin, painfully doll man spent so much of his life worrying about postage stamps, made it very hard to stay awake. And you're worried about your assignment, Mr. Spencer added Nigel. I was at Parker. Oh yes. He said that's exactly the type of thing I was trying to avoid thinking about. So what was your extra credit assignment for Mr. Spencer asked Friday. That's just the problems at Parker throwing up his hands in frustration. I could do anything. Anything at all. It's all part of vice-principal. Pete's new freedom policies. Now, how am I meant to narrow it down from that? Deciding what to do is harder than the assignment. There must've been, some parameters said Friday, not really said parka. I just had to do an experiment about anything. I liked then write up my method and results. Miss dispenses said, I was such a terrible student. It was the least challenging assignment he could think to give me interest in said Friday, she stood up and walked to the counter where the school nurse had written up a report and Parker's condition. It says here, your core body temperature was 35.5 degrees centigrade. You said pocket pulling the blankets up closer to his chin. And I'm not telling you how she measured that. Suffice it to say, I feel violated. Well, aside from that, you feel well as Friday, fine said Parker a bit achy, but I suppose that's to be expected from sleeping on a field in the cold rain Friday continued reading the report. The nurse has written down that she administered one standard size bandaid. Where did she apply it? Oh, that's nothing said pocket. I had a sore finger, just a blister really said Friday, may I see there's nothing to see said Parker. She put a bandaid over it. Parker held up his hand to show them the bandaid had a picture of a pirate on it. Nice approved Melanie. I like a cheerful band-aid did you have this blister before you slept on the field asked Friday? I don't think so said Parker looking at his finger, but I did poke my Curry several times. So it might be a Curry burn. Intriguing said Friday. Nigel. Tell me did anything go missing from your dorm room last night? Other than Parker? Of course. No said Nigel, are you sure asked Friday no lightweight clothing or large sheets of paper? No. Well actually yes said Nigel. My Spider-Man poster went missing from the wall, but I assume some bullying six form took it. They took our sheets and blankets last week. Just for laugh, you know, pocket. Do you have your room? Key asked Friday it'd be a, my trouser pocket said Parker pointing to where his wet clothes were draped over a chair at the side of the room. Melanie was closest. So she picked up the trousers and checked. It's not here. Bonds Friday turned to see the headmaster standing in the doorway. What are you doing here? He demanded you should be in class. I'm investigating Parker's mysterious accident, said Friday and admiring his bandaid added Melanie. There's nothing mysterious about it's at the headmaster. The full just took a nap in a row. Rain storm. He does dimwitted, things like that. All the time actually had mastered. You're entirely wrong said Friday, but before I take you through what really happened, I insist you call an ambulance. Parker should be examined by a cardiologist immediately, but I've just got a sore finger protested Parker. No, you haven't said Friday. Well technically yes you do. But in this instance, the small blister on your finger is a symptom of a much more serious incident. It is as parka, you were struck by lightning said Friday, preposterous said the headmaster cools at Nigel. It's the only explanation that makes sense that Friday, it doesn't sound sensible. At all said that headmaster pocket was given the assignment of conducting an experiment. Any experiments that Friday here's a not terribly bright or knowledgeable boy. It's true. A great pocket nodding, Melanie patted him on the hand, sympathetically. He couldn't think of an experiment said Friday. His understanding of the principles of science is so poor. He barely knows what an experiment is. I wanted to ask said Parker, but I felt silly bringing it up after I'd been studying science for four years. But right before dinner Parker had been in history class at Friday where he had been studying Benjamin Franklin. What the American politician asked the headmaster. Yes, Benjamin Franklin was a politician as well as a postmaster, a diplomat and a scientist said Friday, a scientist who performed one of the most famous experiments of all time. Oh dear. I said the headmaster. I think I know where this is going. Benjamin Franklin flew a kite in a rainstorm using a key as a lightning rod to draw electricity from the clouds into a glass jar said Friday. I like kite said parka, how did you figure all this out? Ask the headmaster. Mr. Pilcher is missing. Some bamboo cane said Friday, and a poster is missing from Nigel's wall. They were the clues. When Parker heard the rumble of an electrical storm, he had an idea or rather he remembered Benjamin Franklin's idea. Parker didn't have a kite. So he made one with the canes and the poster and rushed out into the rain. He tied his room, key to the string, launched the kite and tested his hypothesis. And like almost everyone who has attempted this experiment other than Benjamin Franklin pocket was struck by lightning. And that's why my finger hurts us parka. It's the entrance wound explained Friday, the electrical surge would a stream down the WIC string to the hand. You were holding it with then pass through your body, into the wet ground. That's why your muscles are achy. Your entire body spent three milliseconds in total spasm. Oh my goodness. Exclaim the headmaster. He lent out into the corridor and called to his receptionist. Ms. Pritchard call an ambulance. Now he turned it back to the room. Just think of the lawsuits. It's not so bad said Friday. Several people have died trying to copy this experiment. But what about my assignments said, Parker, what will Mr. Spencer say? Well, he can't complain said, Melanie, you did conduct an experiment and you certainly had dramatic results at it Friday, but I'm going to have to ride it all upset Parker. And my finger hurts just hand in a charred branch from the burnt Elm tree on the edge of the forest suggested Friday. What's that got to do with anything else? Parker, when you're kite was struck by lightning, it would have caught fire explained Friday. Then when you lost consciousness, it would have blown away until it caught on the tree. It's an excellent example of cause and effect. If you write it up, even Mr. Spencer will have to pass you. And so the case was solved the end. Thank you for listening to support this podcast just by a book by me, are I spread? There's plenty to choose from, from across the Friday Barnes, pesky kids, and then Piggins series. And now there's my new book. Shockingly good stories, which is based on this podcast. You can order any of these things through your local bookstore or go to my website, RA sprat.com and click on the book. Depository banner. They have all my titles and free international shipping. That's it for now until next time. Goodbye.