R.A. Spratt: 0:00
Welcome to Bedtime Stories with R.A. Spratt. Today's story is a Friday Barnes tale and it's 'The Case of the Stolen Sandwich.'
R.A. Spratt: 0:16
Friday was sitting in English at the back of her classroom, practising forging the signature of the president of the school council she was supposed to be reading that week. Set text The Dummy's Guide to Mandarin, the English teacher. Mrs. Cannon was going to China for her holiday, so she wanted her class to learn Chinese Mandarin so they could help. A practise learn in Chinese might seem like an odd way to teach English, but Mrs can argue that the process of learning a foreign language helped a student appreciate the building blocks of Senate structure in their own language. Besides, if anyone in management questioned her curriculum choice, she would just accuse them of being racist. But Friday already knew about the five colonel levels to imbue, meaning the Mandarin. So she was using her time to work on her forgery skills. It doesn't look very convincing, said Melanie, looking over Friday's work. It's a surprisingly hard signature to do, said Friday. Handwriting has evolved so much of the last 30 years, but Mr Abercrombie seems to have a particularly old fashioned style, he writes, the way people used to write back in the 19th century, when they wrote with quills and ink. It's exceptionally hard to forge unless he learned handwriting back in the 19th century, said Melanie. Then it would come naturally to you. There's a knock at the door. A messenger hurried over to Mrs Cannon and handed her a note. Mrs. Cannon looked up Friday. Oh dear, Friday, What have you done now as Mrs Cannon? I don't think I've done anything, said Friday, at least nothing more than usual, according to this note. You have to go to the headmaster's office immediately, said Mrs Cannon Chorus. The class you're in for it now, Barnes said. Mirabella Peterson Because, continued Mrs Cannon, there is a police officer waiting for you who chorus the class again, this time louder. I'm pretty sure I haven't done anything police worth, he said Friday. If you want to make a run for it, we'll back you up, said Mrs Cannon. You could climb out the window dash down to the swamp. We'll come up with a convincing cover Storey, for your absence will be a good exercise in creative storytelling for us, arguably even more relevant to the English syllabus, then learning Mandarin. It's all right, said Friday. If the police are after me, I'm curious to know why. But thank you for the kind offer to hinder an investigation for me. Ah, pleasure, said Mrs Cannon. I do enjoy bamboozling the boys in blue or grey or green. Really, any man in uniform brings out the worst in my behaviour. Friday hurried over to the headmaster's office, she did feel more than a little sick with worry as she approached. If she wasn't being arrested then the alternatives weren't much better. The only other reason the police could be there was because something had happened to someone in her family. You wanted to see me, said Friday as she pushed open the headmaster's door. She was relieved to see it was the local police sergeant, not some federal agents standing in front of the headmaster's desk. Oh, yes, Sergeant Crowley has some questions for you, said the headmaster. I haven't done anything protested Friday. If you have evidence that I have that I'm being framed, all know, said Sergeant Crowley, It's not those type of questions. I'm not here to arrest you. I'm here to ask for help from May said Friday. The police allowed to ask Children for assistance. This matter is too big to worry about the rules of the police sergeant. If I get it wrong, it's my career on the line. I want to run the details of the case past you. I need to cheque if I'm missing something. Why? May said Friday. Don't you have other officers at the precinct, then help, said the police sergeant. They all think like police officers. I need someone with a different brain because the facts as I see them don't make any sense. All right, said Friday, Do you have the case files here? I've got security camera footage of what you just look at, said the police sergeant. It's a very discreet matter, so I'd rather show it to you down at the station. Just understand Friday, said the headmaster. You don't have to go along with this. You don't have to get involved with the police case. If you don't want to is the choice is to spend the afternoon at the police station or spend the afternoon in ancient history with Mr Braithwaite learning about things I taught myself five years ago, said Friday. That's an easy decision to make. Let's go, Sergeant. I'm sure an excursion to your station will be far more educational. When Friday and Sergeant Crowley got to the police station, he let her in the back door. The other officers don't need to know about this set. Sergeant Crowley. They're always getting their feelings hurt if I let one officer put on the handcuffs two times in a row, or if someone gets Mohr of their fair turn of being allowed to use the siren, he led her into an interview room Friday was surprised to see Mr Lee from the local supermarket was already sitting in there. A television and DVR were all set up. How is this going to help us, Mr Lee? Is she some sort of extremely young looking undercover detective? No, this is Friday. She's more of a consultant, said Sergeant Crowley. She thinks in a weird way, So when something weird happens, she's got a better chance of figuring it out. It all looks pretty straightforward to me, said Mr Lee. It's shoplifting. You've got to make an arrest. If that's the case, then I will certainly make an arrest that Sergeant Crowley. But in this instance, I want to dot all the I's and cross all the t's first. Why don't you just explain the case to me? Said Friday on. I'll see if I could be of help. All right, so the police sergeant, I'm going to show you the closed circuit television footage from inside Mr Lee's shop. What you're going to see must not leave this room. You mustn't tell anyone you were never here. Do you understand? Your use of hyperbole is irritating, said Friday, But I shall agree simply to speed things along. See for yourself, said Sergeant Crowley. He press play on the DVR, a grainy image, flick it onto the screen, then pixelated into focus. It was a wide angle view of the supermarket. Miss Aly Shop wasn't really a supermarket by normal standards, but in the small town it was the only supermarket, so people refer to it as such. There were two aisles, and on the left hand I'll a row of open refrigerated cases were lined up along the wall. The closest had ready made sandwiches and yoghourts for sale. The police sergeant was fast forwarding through the footage, so customers seem to zip in and out of the supermarket like adrenaline starts. Here we go, said Sergeant Crowley. He press play and the footage slowed to normal speed. There were two old ladies shopping for gravy in Aisle two on a teenager at the back of the store, picking out potato chips when an elderly man walked into frame. He was wearing corduroy slacks on a smart navy blue coat from the back of his head. He seemed to have neat short hair, and, strangely, he seemed to be wearing a bad fake town. Friday watched as a man walked over to the sandwich cabinet. He looked over one shoulder, then the other is it to see if anyone was looking, then picked up three sandwiches, tucked them inside his coat? I walked straight for the door. The police cited stopped the footage. What do you think? Our Sergeant Crowley here, Mr Lee, We're looking intently at Friday. What is there to think? Asked Friday. I agree with Mr Lee. It looks like a straightforward case of shoplifting, but here's the catch set, Sergeant Crowley. Do you recognise the man? No, said Friday. Should I? That is F W Blakehurst, said Sergeant Crowley, the billionaire said Friday, immediately recognising the name. She'd read it many times in the newspapers. F. W. Blakehurst had made his fortune in building and running hundreds of private hospitals around the world, but that looks nothing like him. F. W. Blake has been portly in all the photos I've seen in them in the newspapers. This man, it's too skinny. That's him, said Sergeant Crowley. He's one of the top 10 richest people in the country, and he went into the local mini market and stole three sandwiches, said Friday. If it were only three sandwiches I could live with That said Mr Lee, What do you mean, How's Friday? He's stolen 63 sandwiches, said Mr Lee. He's been coming in every day for the last three weeks and stealing three sandwiches, and you're only doing something about it now. As Friday. He's the richest man in town, said Mr Lee. His household buys all the groceries from my store. That's hundreds of dollars worth of business per week. So when he started stealing sandwiches, I thought that he just getting a bit senile. I let it go because he's such a good customer. So why you bring it to the police now? Asked Friday because last week his new housekeeper stopped by in their food from us, said Mr Lee, she must be driving into the city to do a shopping or getting it delivered by one of those Internet companies. So he's not such a good customer anymore, said Friday. Worse than that, said Mr Lee. His escalated things. What do you mean? Asked Friday, he started out just stealing ham sandwiches, said Mr Lee, that's not such a big deal. My wife makes the sandwiches herself. The overheads aren't hi. It's not a great loss for us. But in the last two days, he's taken things up a notch. He started stealing the prawn and avocado sandwich is the ingredients cost a lot more Three of those a day, 21 per week. That's a significant loss for our business, I see, said Friday. Let me watch the footage again. The police sergeant re cue the video on Friday watched again, paying close attention to everything the old ladies in the gravy, the teenager with the chips and then Mr Blakehurst entering on, walking straight to the sandwiches, looking about picking up three at once, tucking them away, then walking out, glancing about in one more time as he left. Pause, it said Friday, Take it back slowly. You've seen something, said the police sergeant. It be good if you could find some mitigating factor. I really don't want to have to arrest one of the wealthiest men in the country. Even if he is guilty as sin, who'll get some fancy pants, Lawyer will make mincemeat off me in court. There's a product for Is it there? Now? Roll it forward Super slowly. The footage was at the point where Mr Blakehurst had started walking out. He was glancing about himself, Stop said Friday. The footage froze with Mr Blake is looking up straight into the barrel of the camera, so he's looking at the camera, said Sergeant Crowley. What's the big deal? He thinks I'm an idiot, said Mr Lee. He thinks I don't cheque the security footage or that it's a fake camera. Well, he's got another thing coming. No, it's more significant than that, said Friday Sergeant. You'd better call the SWAT team. What for our Sergeant Crowley? What you've got here is a hostage situation, said Friday. Are you sure? Are Sergeant Crowley? Why would a billionaire with a live in housekeeper steal three premade sandwiches that have probably been sitting around getting stale for hours? Asked Friday. Hey, my wife makes those protesting Mr Lee, it's no reflection on her if people have no self esteem when it comes to what they're prepared to put in their body, said Friday, can you please be less insulting to Mrs Lee and get to the point? Are Sergeant Crowley? He's stealing three a days at Friday because he needs three meals a day for three weeks. He hasn't wanted to eat. The meal is being prepared for him at home because he's being poisoned. How can you possibly know that our sergeant Crowley, see the oranges tinge to his skin, said Friday. It looks like a poorly applied fake town, but it is actually jaundice, which is symptomatic of arsenic or heavy metal poisoning. This man is being poisoned. He realised it and is trying to take evasive action. So why not come to the police? Asked Sergeant Crowley, the perpetrator must have a hostage, said Friday. But Mr Blackest isn't married and he has no Children, said Sergeant Crowley. Does he have a dog? Asked Friday, From my experience, extremely wealthy people often care more about their dogs than they do their spouses. He's got an Irish setter court, George said. Mr Lee, he always is too tied up outside the shop. But I haven't seen George for weeks. Three weeks. You must act swiftly, Sergeant Friday. If I'm not mistaken that not only is Mr Blake kissed in danger of being poisoned, then George is in danger of meeting a nasty end when the sergeant rated Mr Blake has mentioned half an hour later Friday was proved to be entirely correct. Mr. Blockers had begun to suspect his housekeeper was poisoning a month earlier, but when he tried to fire her, she arranged her brother to come in dog map George. She then told Mr Blake us that not only was he not firing her, he was going to increase her wages tenfold, or George would be sent to the great farmhouse in the sky. Mr Blake. Us then began to suspect that his housekeeper was poison him partly because everything he ate tasted faintly of Armand's, but also after a while, because he started to suffer the symptoms of liver failure. So he began pretending to eat his food and stealing sandwiches from the supermarket in town. Thanks for your help Friday, said the police sergeant as he drove her back to school. That could have gone disastrously wrong if I'd arrested Mr Blakehurst or if he died of the poison, it said Friday. Yes, that would have been bad, too, agreed the police sergeant. Ironically, if Mr Lee hadn't been so kind and generous and being prepared to turn a blind eye to Mr Blaker shoplifting, then poor George could have been rescued three weeks earlier, said Friday.
R.A. Spratt: 12:22
Thank you for listening. To support this podcast, just go to your local bookstore or favourite online seller to buy a book by me R.A. Spratt. There's lots to choose from from across the 'Nanny Piggins, 'Friday Barnes' and 'Pesky Kids' series. Until next time. Goodbye
