Bedtime Stories with R.A. Spratt

Friday Barnes and the Potato Dash

November 17, 2021 R.A. Spratt Season 1 Episode 91
Bedtime Stories with R.A. Spratt
Friday Barnes and the Potato Dash
Show Notes Transcript

When Binky asks Friday to help him win the school's annual 'Potato Dash' race, she is shocked by the level of cheating that is actively encouraged. But one of the competitors goes to far.

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Speaker 1:

Hello, and welcome to bedtime stories with me, RA spread well today on the show, I'm going to read you a chapter from Friday bonds, big trouble, or the third book in the series, as I always think of it. And the reason I'm reading this chapter is because I have just finished right in Friday, Barnes 10 undercover. And that's going to come out on the first or 2nd of February, so only a couple of months away. So to get you ready for that, I thought I'd read this story because for characters in this story from book three are going to reappear in book 10. So this is a great warm-up story for you to hear. So here we go. This is chapter 14, trouble with Binky. When Friday and Melanie returned to their dorm room, they found the door unlocked. Someone's broken in whispered Friday. Oh, again said, Melanie, we should go in and find out who it is. It might be a dangerous psychopath set. Friday, who at this school is a dangerous psychopath as Melanie half the student body said Friday. And all the teachers in the maths department, I suppose agreed Melanie. Well, we could stay out here, but the dangerous psychopath is bound to find us eventually. So we might as well go in and get it over with all right, said Friday, but stay behind me. If he's violent, I'll try reasoning with him while you run to fetch help. Oh, I'd rather run to the dining room and have another jam. Tart said, Melanie, they were very good. Tonight. Friday pushed open the door to the room. Who's in here. She called, oh, it's only me Friday. Stuck her head around the door. Binkie Melanie's older brother Binky was sitting on her bed. He was perched on the corner because he was self-conscious that he was a large boy and he didn't want to rumble or break anything accidentally. Why did you break into our room? Friday asked. Oh, I didn't. He said shocked at the suggestion. The door was wide open when I arrived. Oh, that's probably my fault said Melanie closing things is not my strong suit. That's why I always try to leave the room with you. I know you're closed the door behind you, but I know if I'm on my own, the responsibility is just too much. Well, what are you doing here? Becky asked Friday. Have you just come to visit Melanie? No said Binky. Earnestly. I need your help. You're not in a fight again. I, you asked Friday. Oh gosh, no said Binky, shaking his head. Something much worse. What else? Melanie Binky leaned forward and whispered. I fallen in love. Oh, dear said, Melanie. I know said Binky shaking his head in agreement. Now what asks Friday? Binky. Isn't very good at that type of thing. Explain Melanie, you know, expressing himself and talking to girls. He talks to me said Friday. Yes, but I don't think of you as a girls had Binky. Why not ask Friday? I think of you more as a figure of authority who rescues me? Well, I've got myself in a terrible bother, said Binky truthfully. Well, that is nice. Said Friday, but you could think of me as a girl as well. I suppose that Binky his brow wrinkles. He thought about it, but it's not entirely my fault. You're the one who chooses to wear those cardigans. So who are you in love with us? Melanie? I don't know. Her name said Binky. Why not ask Friday? Haven't had the courage to ask said Binky, seriously. She's too beautiful for just a run of the mill sort of conversation. I'd have to think of something charming to say. And that could take hours. So where have you seen harass? Melanie here said Binky in our room last Friday. She's your neighbor said Binky. Ah, the princess, everyone seems to be falling in love with her. No, not that one said Binky shaking his head. She's not to my taste at all too. Pretty and princessy. I didn't know you had a tight Binky said Melanie. I do say Binky. So what does your love interest look like us Friday? Oh, she's radiant said Binky. His eyes glazed over as he imagined her she's petite has shiny brownish hair and has lips the color of well lips. So in other words, she's short has clean hair and normal colored lips set Friday. Yes. That's her said Binky, happily. And she has the warmest heart. How do you know if you've never spoken to her? Melanie? Because she never says anything said Binky. She just glows through her eyes. At least. I think she does. It's hard to tell because she wears rather thick glasses. You've fallen in love with Debbie exclaimed Friday. I have said Binky jolly good. I knew I was doing the right thing coming to you. You always helped me out. Why don't you just knock on the door and say, hello said Friday. Oh, you out of your mind said Binky. He looked horrified by the suggestion. Well, that lead to a conversation said Friday. Well, that's not a good idea that isn't said pinky, hardly my strength. He's got a point of great Melanie. Then what's your plan. Last Friday, I was thinking of impressing her by going in the potato dash said Binky what's that Friday or once a year, they hold a race around. The quadrangle said Melanie runners have to sprint through the corridors of the buildings that make the forks size of the quadrangle. Then be the first to touch the flagpole in the center all while carrying a 20 kilos sack potatoes. It's a great honor to win said Binky. The vice principal won it when he was a student here said Melanie really explained Friday. There was a bout of chickenpox that year explained Melanie, who was the only entry. There is one floor in your plan set. Friday only one said Binky, what is it? You're very slow said Friday. Oh, that's a bit harsh said Binky taken it back. I know my score on the IQ test was a bit on the low side, but I try my best. I don't mean your brain's set Friday, although it is added Melanie. I mean, you're not very fast at running. I, you said Friday. No, you do have a point there. A great Binky, but you might've noticed that I'm a big chap, obviously tall, but also under these clothes, please don't be disgusting. Binky said, Melanie, well under the clothes, I've got a lot of muscles that Binky, the rugby Mazda has me lifting weights. I can bench press a lot of those heavy disc things they put on the bar bell. I thought if I kit it up in running shorts and a singlet, I might cut an impressive sight. Catch the eye of, you know what I mean? Friday shook her head to try and rid herself of the mental image of Binky in skimpy shorts. I think I get the gist of it. So what do you need from us? Ask Melanie. I wanted to talk it through with, you said Binky. Find out what you thought of it as an idea. It sounds like a terrible idea said Friday, but that doesn't mean it won't work. The potato dash what's that smell asked Melanie Friday and Melanie was standing with Binky at the starting line of the potato dash. All the other competitors were limbering up with stretches or by bouncing up and down on the spot Friday, sniff the air. There was a very disagreeable aroma it's part tiger balm part, fear, sweat, and partly the Chuck poo, Mr. Pilcher is currently watering into the flower beds. On the far side of the science block said Friday. I knew athletic events were unpleasant, but I didn't realize that smell so bad said Melanie. So who's the favorite to win us Friday Higginbottom is fast. And so as Derek Struthers and Jamison said Binky, but Raja, Battelle and Derek's brother Jason, a devious they're roommates. Last year, they concocted a scheme to slow everyone down with banana peels. Did it work as Friday? No. The winner just punched Patel in the nose and kept running said, Melanie, your super brain. He said, Binky turn into Friday. Do you have any tips on how to win a running race? There's no point asking her now said Melanie, she's too distracted by seeing Ian in his super short running shorts. I am not said Friday. I haven't even noticed him. Friday turned around and saw in right behind her. He was stretching his quadriceps while standing on one leg Friday. I'd never seen him in so little clothing before students usually will polo shirts for PE a much longer shorts. Not that Friday ever attended PA lessons. If she could avoid it. She'd never noticed how lean and muscular Ian's shoulders were before. Now. She's distracted said Melanie Wayne's got is a double threats, had Binky he's fast and sneaky and smirked. As he caught Friday staring at him like what you see as Dan, you have a pleasing cemetery said Friday, truthfully and raised his eyebrows. You know, you're good looking. You don't need me to tell you. You said Friday in smiled, please stop flirting with him. I'm trying to concentrate on winning this race. Friday's otherwise incredibly intelligent. Brian was suddenly unable to organize itself into finding a suitable cutting retort. All she could think to say was blah, but she realized this didn't sum up her thoughts and feelings adequately. So she simply turned back to Binky. Do I have to slap you to get you to focus as Melanie? No. I'm focused at Friday. Run me through the rules of the race and maybe we can find a loophole or there aren't any said Binky cheating is traditional. You're allowed to cheat said Friday long as you run from the starting line, all the way to the finishing line, through all four buildings at Binky, it doesn't matter what you do to any of the other competitors along the way. That's a Pauline said Friday, not at all said Binky. The headmaster who founded the race believed that cutthroat in brutally unfair competition was good preparation for real life. And he's probably got a point there considered Friday. Have you had any thoughts on how you might cheat pinky asked Melanie? Well, I'm good at rugby said Binky. So I thought I could have a go at tackling someone only problem is it would leave me lying on the ground too. And it's hard to win a race from that position. My advice is to run slowly said Friday really said Binky. I liked the sound of that because running slowly sounds easier than running quickly, but it's not the best way to win a race. You stand no chance of victory through cheating or natural ability. You continued Friday. The only way you can win is if the whole race degenerates into total chaos and all the faster runners take each other out. Oh, that would be good. Set. Pinky. All you've got to do is jog along at the back and try not to get knocked over advised Friday and be handsome while you do it said Melanie to catch Debbie's eye. But Binky had stopped paying attention. Oh my gosh, this, yes. Debbie was standing just a few feet away from them. They hadn't noticed her until now because Debbie was the type of person you could easily not notice she was wearing her usual, baggy cardigan, but I hair was tied back in a ponytail and she was wearing runners leggings. She's going in. The race said Binky. Wow said, Melanie girls don't usually enter because it gets so violent. And there were so many injuries. I didn't expect her to be the athletic type said Binky. Does it put you off fast? Melanie? Not at all said Binky. I'm prepared to be open-minded 10 minutes till we start the race called the vice-principal, who was acting as race Marshall for the event. Make sure you've all signed your legal waivers before the whistle goes, Debbie pulled her cardigan over her head. Gosh, exclaimed, pinky or stunner Friday looked closely at Debbie. She was wearing a very baggy gray t-shirt admittedly with the leg. And she was more athletic than Friday might have guessed. But she clearly wasn't seeing things with the same gossamer lenses that Binky was. Now you pinky said, Melanie,[inaudible] take off. Your Jersey said, Melanie, that's the whole point. Remember he's supposed to be showing yourself off as eye candy. Oh yes. Of course had Binky. He pulled his own sweater over his head. Binky had grown since Friday. I had first met him. He was at least six foot four now. And the weight work had paid off. He even had muscles in his Friday. Knew she must have muscles in her own neck or else her head would fall off. But the muscles in Binky's neck was sinewy and purposeful like tree roots. Friday. Notice Debbie taken a secret glance at binkies muscly chest thinky. I think he might be more brilliant than we realize said Friday. Your Skippy clothing idea just might work rhinos. Lift your potatoes called the vice-principal. The entrance picked up the potato sacks from the look of concentration on their faces. 20 kilos of potatoes balance on the back of your neck was heavy just to hold, let alone run with. Remember there are no rules. The first person to run around all four card halls and then touch the flagpole while still carrying his second potatoes is the winner. Is that clear? No one responded or even nodded their heads. They didn't want to dislodge their potato sacks from their next take. Your places called the vice-principal all the entrance jockeyed for a good position on the starting line made a superior entrant. When yelled the vice principal before firing his start, his pistol bang. They were off running at breakneck speed down the first corridor, shoving and bumping each other. As they fought the best position coming up to the first doorway Patel got there first and in an act of blatant cheating, grabbed one of the doors and swung it back into Ian, knocking him down flat the Skittle half a dozen runners as they tripped over in which cause the rest of the runners to bottleneck in the doorway, stumbling out and falling down the stairs. Binky who was running at the back leaped over the stack of fallen runners. Hey you, that's not cricket because he called out to Patel. Patel looked over his shoulder and laughed thinky in an uncharacteristic flash of quick thinking whipped off his size 14 shoe and threw it at Patel. It hit him neatly on the ankle, causing him to trip and slam into the vending machine in the corridor. The other runners swarmed past pinkie and started sprinting down. The second corridor bursting out of the building and bounding up the stairs into the third corridor. Binky was lumbering along at the back wearing only one shoe. Debbie was in the middle of the pack. Derek Struthers was now in the lead. It looks like is going to win so Friday you think so said Melanie, but something melodramatic always happens in this rice. Her words were immediately proven true. There was a tearing sound and Derek's potatoes spilled all over the floor. All the runners behind him started slipping and rolling on the potatoes, slamming into each other and tumbling down. Debbie stood on one and her feet went out from under her, the potato sack around her neck, pulling her over and she landed face down on top of three year nine boys. Binky was the only runner left standing. Ron Binky yelled Friday Cod Melanie, that pinkie stopped dead, dropped his potatoes and bent over to help Debbie, by picking up a sack for her. These potatoes are very light. He said confused. Debbie blushed. I hollow them out. She confessed. Have I shocked you I'm astounded at Binky? Not only are you beautiful, but you're clever as well. I'm going to use the potato to make mash later said, Debbie, do you want to come over and help me ate it? I'd love to sit pinky, happily Binky, put Debbie sack back on her shoulders. Then swung his own second to position. The pair started running, picking their way through the fallen runners and potatoes. Jason Struthers was up ahead and on his feet at the front of the chaos. He burst out of the final doorway and sprinted for the flagpole, Binky and Debby chased after him. But Jason held his lead. He slapped the whitewash timber, dropped a sack on the ground and let in the air in triumph, accidentally kicking the vice-principal with his muddy shoes, much to the delight of the crowd. Sorry about that. So set Jason quite all right. So the vice principal Winston as a fellow winner of the potato dash, I understand the brilliance that goes with victory. And in the record time of one minute and 49 seconds to princess Ingrid stepped forward with a winner's cup and handed it to Jason. Congratulations. She said formerly Jason took the cup and grabbed princess Ingrid in a big hug. Oh, gross. She's Korean bless warmly. You're all wet with sweat. Jason held the couple offs and the crowd cheered and now set the vice principal, a smoker pleasure returning to his face, their traditional prize for the runner up a kick in the pants from the winner. Jason grinned Binky stepped forward, resigned to his fate. The crowd whooped and hooted stop right there called Friday, stepping protectively in front of Binky. No one will be kicking Binky in the pants today. At least not for coming. Second. Why have I not asked the vice principal? I'll have, you know, it's an ancient tradition of this school, hardly ancients at Melanie. The school's only 70 years old. Still it's important to uphold customs at the vice-principal Binky should not be kicked said Friday because he did not come second. He won because Jason cheated exploded the vice principal. That's a re-agent protest to Jason. I competed fair and square. Besides cheating, as allowed said, the vice principal it's in the roles. Oh yes. Cheating is allowed a great Friday. So there's nothing wrong with getting your roommates to slam a door on the rest of the runners or having your brother's sabotage his sack of potatoes. You did those things as the vice principal maybe said, Jason, as you say, it's not against the rules. Exactly agreed. The vice principal. That's just strategy and tactics entirely admirable unless they weren't tactics to slow down. The other runners said Friday, they were tactics to distract everyone. While one of the runners slipped out of the pack into a classroom, climbed out a window, ran counter-clockwise around the outside of the quadrangle buildings climbed in through another window in the science block and rejoined the race just as we were again, distracted by all the runners falling over on potatoes. That's fuss of course at the vice-principal. Did you see Jason running in the second or third corridors as Friday? Well, I'm sure he was there. So the vice principal, there were 60 runners said Friday. No one would notice if he slipped away, when such a dramatic accident was occurring, you can't prove it's adjacent. That's where you're wrong. Said Friday to approve. You did exactly that. All I have to do is take one sniff of the vice-principals close Friday, leaned in and took a good long sniff of the mud stain on the vice-principals shirt front. Oh, gross exclaim. The crowd just as I suspected said Friday, Chuck Pooh said the vice principal, the race was run on linoleum flooring and bitchumen said Friday. And yet Jason has muddy shoes because he jumped out of a window and landed in a flower bed. And I know for a fact that only this morning, Mr. Pilcher put chicken manure on all the flowerbeds on the east side of the school, circumstantial evidence said, Jason, my shoes could have got dirty anywhere. Then there was the hug you gave princess. Ingrid said Friday. According to her, you are disgustingly wet and sweaty. He was at princess Ingrid. I'm going to have to get my entire outfit, dry cleaned, but that's impossible said Friday, the race only takes two minutes, but it takes the human body. 10 minutes from initial exertion for sweat to appear. Look at you. Even now, the other runners are panting, but they're not sweaty. They won't be for another three minutes. So I ran faster, said Jason and I started sweating faster too, but I can prove the liquid on your face and body. It's not sweat. So Friday she stepped forward, ran her finger down Jason's cheek and then licked it. Oh, gross chorus. The crowd again, just as I suspected said, Friday, no salt. That liquid is not sweat. It's water from the sprinkler. Mr. Pilcher set up in the rose garden. I bet right now there's a muddy footprint in your shoe size on the window. Sill of the biology classroom changing is allowed in the rules. Jason had a look on his face as if you'd like to strangle Friday, but the race was over. So heedless violence would no longer be acceptable. Cheating is allowed a great Friday, but to win an entrant must run around the whole course. The vice-principal took the potato dash cup from Jason, who seemed like he was about to burst into tears. The vice principal handed the cup to princess Ingrid who turned to Binky. She glared at him. I am going to present this to you, but that does not give you the right to hug me. She warned are, you sure said Friday, you'd be safe for another minute before he starts sweating. Quite sure said princess Ingrid, handing over the cup. I'll give you a hug, said Debbie tending to pinky to thank you for your chivalrous behavior. All right. So Binky, his head and neck turned bright red with embarrassment, but he bent over and gave Debbie a big bear hug. She smiled Binky then clearly did not know what to do because he gave Debbie a playful punch on the shoulder that nearly knocked her over. And now for the ceremony or kicking in the pants, that vice principal, you have to kick Debbie. Oh, I'd never dream of doing that. Said Binky. Can I kick Jason? Instead, just this, once I am prepared to bend the rules set, the vice-principal Binky gave Jason a kick that would make his rugby coach proud. And so the case was solved the end.

Speaker 2:

Um,